Perversions

i'm a girl. but gay porn is hot, to me.

I really like women and girls are something I really love but when I was at my friends house (were both boys) and he's 13 and I'm 14 I woke up to him touching me and I let him and we kinda did it he is really attractive but I'm not gay...but he is the only boy I'm attracted to ... what should I do?? I have a girlfriend!!

I'm a boy aged 14 a year ago i sucked my dad's penis and had sex with him and

I'm 14 and I just masturbated and orgasmed with my step-dads toothbrush in my pussy

I've been masterbating ever since I was a little girl. I don't know how it started, or even why. But to this day, I can't sleep unless I get off. I realize at age 18 masterbation is something normal and even healthy, but I remember it starting somwhere around age 8.

It makes me feel like a sick perverted person. What if I am?

I am a pedophile. I never wanted to be nor do I know how I became one and that's what upsets me the most, I do not know how. I grew up Christian and a morally centered individual. Nothing perverted or strange happened to me when I was growing to turn me this way and if you were to meet me, I would appear to be a perfectly normal person.

It has gotten pretty bad before. It started with perfectly innocent/legal pictures I told myself but ended with binges of child pornography, always looking for something new, and when I'm finished always begging God for forgiveness. I have chosen to finally quit, and I've been clean for two weeks but it is still a struggle everyday. A thought will pop up at anytime, and I must fight an internal battle between short term happiness and immediate guilt versus what feels like denial of myself.

There have been times where I have gotten close to children. There was a ten-year-old girl at my church; my father was a Sunday school teacher so I would always be his assistant; fortunately I never got alone with her; I don't know what I would have done. There was also my best friend's seven-year-old brother. I would go over to his house and help him with his homework, play games, and even volunteered to babysit him. But thank God I never violated him or any child for that matter.

What also scares me is that I also have never had a "normal" relationship. I've had three girlfriends in my seventeen years of life and even though I've tried hard in the relationships I've never felt affectionate towards the other party. This has resulted in me turning down every girl since my last girlfriend. It's almost as if I'm only attracted to children and they are the only ones that I can seem to feel affectionate for.

The irony is that I actually do care for children. I genuinely love children but I cannot seem to love them in a NORMAL way. I cannot seem to love them without sinister intentions; I don't want to harm children; that's the last thing I want to do. I've even planned out how I would kidnap children, but I always excuse the idea because I know the trauma that would be involved with the child.

I fear having a family although I want one. I always wonder, "What if I have a daughter? How long until I start feeling attracted towards her? How long until I start ABUSING her? How long until I begin to ruin her life? How would I explain it to her? Am I going to call it 'Daddy-Daughter Day/Time?' Am I going to say that 'This is normal honey.' when she starts crying asking me to stop hurting her? Would I even be able to stop?" I WANT to be the father that she looks up to. I WANT to be the father that helps his children through good and bad. But I feel I can't be that the way that I am.

What I have just told you is something I have never told anyone before. I feel that I cant. If I tell one person about my struggle to be good they may take it the wrong way and if they do, this is something that they are going to tell everyone. I can't even tell my father who is the closest person to me because he freely vocalizes that he would "kill all people who mess with children." I don't know of any "AA/NA" pedophile equivalents and I don't even know where to find a therapist/psychologist, how much it would cost, or even if it would work. So I am at a crossroads, destroy myself or destroy others? I do not know what happens next and I have so many questions. What if the opportunity to abuse a child presents itself? Will I act or will I contain myself? What if I DO have a family and children? Can I get help? Will that help work? I am a man who thinks of others first and myself second. I have thought a few times about killing myself. Not because I felt guilty, confused, or depressed, but because I wonder, "Would it be better and safer for others if I didn't exist?"

This is the struggle I face everyday. It's hard being the scum of the earth.

I am a straight man and a have a girlfriend for 3 years. But sometimes i masturbate to men. I don't know why but i like to see hard dicks. I sometimes masturbate to tranny movies. I've never had a real homossexual relation.

Whenever I hear the song "Just Can't Get Enough" by the Black Eyed Peas, I start thinking dirty things fitting the lyrics, especially the part where will.i.am says "Let me love you down this evening", and I feel so guilty about it.

You told me to suck your dick and quit being "fake" with it. I would say rape, but I love disrespectful men, and that's what I like about cha!

I want to be smooshed into your naked fat body.